Responses to DB - A Blog Series - Finances

*This is the last post of this series. This has been a great series for me and I have been forced to think much about these topics. I hope that they were as insightful for you as they were for me.*

The topic of finances is always a tough discussion for me. For most of my life, my earthly father has been my counselor in regards to my financial future and the best things that will help me be successful. The issue arises when we begin to not see eye-to-eye on the path that I am leading in regards to how I will be affected financially. And because of this friction, just about any conversation having to deal with the way in which I handle my finances is a difficult one. However, DB spoke my language on this one!

"Money is a spiritual issue."

How critical is that comment! If we begin to view money in the aspect of its spiritual consequences, we begin to have a new respect for the unit. If we see money as a way to worship God, we see it in a different light. We are able to see it as a gift from God and something that should be used liberally to further His cause. We begin to see it as a spiritual discipline to tithe. Less than 2% of the church tithes! Why? Because it is still tied to them. It is their material possession. It is not God's spiritual loan of sustenance. When we begin to see this as a blessing from the LORD, we are able to see that it is not ours and that we did nothing to earn another material possession. Rather, we did what we could to glorify God with our talents and gifts and He blessed us with the sustenance for another day or week.

DB quoted Jim Dobson in this way:

"Whatever I own ends up owning me."

I think about this and I start to understand what Jim is talking about. At the beginning of last year, I purchased a car. This car was pretty nice. Ok, I probably spent too much money on the item, but I could afford the monthly payment and decided to commit to 5 years of payments. The loan is neither here nor there. The point is that the coming days and weeks and probably even months, I was obsessed with the car. I would wash it every week, I would sweep it out every week and I wanted to show it off to everyone that wanted to see it. I became obsessed with the car. I wonder what I could have done with that obsession? What lives would have been changed if I use that energy and fervor in the manner that glorifies God?

I am reminded of what Jesus said after his encounter with the Rich Young Ruler in Mark:

"It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God." - Mark 10:24b-25

I have been blessed for much of my life with plenty. I have been blessed with the ability to not worry about having a meal at the table or money for gas in my car. I enter into a time that I will probably not be as blessed as I have been for most of my life. How will I manage the little that I will be blessed with? How will I continue to pour out even my finances so that I can continue to follow God's call to reach the lost, poor, and broken and remain a poor man? Is it more noble to be a poor man? How do remain a non-rich man and continue to live a life that allows me to do God's work as a communicator, speaker, teacher, discipler?

Responses to DB - A Blog Series - Taking the Sabbath (Resting the Soul)

Wow. What a topic for Youth Workers! I think that every time that I hear this type of sermon or message, I am hit right between the eyes; Every Time. And most times it hurts. How do I take time for myself when I need to be involved with all of my students' lives and have a relationship with my girlfriend/wife and have a group of people that build into my life and family time and time to build a family and the list seems to never end!

If you haven't found this to be difficult in your life, you may want to check your pulse! I have been in the Intern capacity for only a year and have found it difficult to have just one day of rest in my week. With all the things that I am involved in, I find little time for myself. Usually, I will be forced to find this Sabbath in the form of sleeping in too long for a class or missing a meeting or two. It is in these involuntary times of rest that I realize that I need more time for myself in my regular schedule than I realize or give credit for. And it is simply because I don't prioritize this rest.

In order to effectively enjoy a certain day off and giving myself the opportunity to be recharged by the Spirit, I must prioritize this day as a day that I do nothing but let the Holy Spirit fill my cup. I have no idea what this looks like, but I do know that I need to counsel the Spirit more than I do now and give Him the opportunity to instruct me in the ways of how He wants me to involve Him in my life. So much of this is found in the spiritual disciplines and the value that I place on that aspect of my life. It is so important to accomplish building those into my life in order to hear His voice on those days that I give completely to Him.

You can't pour out if you aren't allowing Him to pour into you!

Responses to DB - A Blog Series - Marriage, Family and the High Calling of Being Single

There is such a need for DB's message to make it out to the world. In a world that values divorce as the remedy to the problems that arise in a marriage, careful examination of ourselves and the possible suitors that present themselves is critical. In my experience with students, the health of the family has continually presented itself as critical to the development of a person's character and life.

So what does this do for me personally as an individual that is already in a committed relationship? What does this mean for a person who is entering into a ministry field that requires me to counsel families from time to time?

I think that key to the process of discerning our place as either single citizens or people of one flesh in marriage to someone of the opposite sex is the notion of selection and keeping our expectations clear in our mind. Knowing what I expect is critical to the assessment of the relationship for you. Being able to identify what I expect out of the relationship or the values that I place on the relationship allows us to know if we are to be in a relationship or not.

I recently had a conversation with a friend of mine and as we were talking about life the topic of her relationship with her boyfriend came up. In this conversation, she noted that she felt like she should not have expectations entering the relationship and throughout the relationship. Ironically, my girlfriend had just had this conversation with me a couple of nights before. One of the questions that DB identified as a key question to ask when deciding on a relationship is: "Do I have a vision in my heart of the type of person that is right for me?" I would reword it slightly to be similar to this:

"Do I have a a vision in my heart for how I would want to be treated in this relationship?"

What I find so amazing is how quickly people, especially girls, are willing to sacrifice their expectations for the relationship. And I find it troubling. How else are you going to gauge how the relationship is going if you disregard your expectations and your values, just so you can avoid confrontation or conflict?

Our expectations allow us to understand what we need from the relationship. It gives us the ability to put into words what we need from the other person in the relationship. Without this understanding, how can we communicate this to them? And on the defensive side of things: How are you going to be able to stand for what you feel is right in the relationship if you are putting your expectations aside?

Keep your expectations. Make them known when you need to. Give yourself credit. If you're expectations are not being met, then something needs to change. This could be the expectation, but if you have nothing to base your dissonance then you have no where to grow.

Happy Relationship Building!

Responses to DB - A Blog Series - Viral Conversations

This topic is ironic because it tied right into the series that we were talking about in Jr. High at NMC. At NMC, we took three weeks to talk bout taming the tongue and the power of our words in people's lives. Even the conversation that we have in passing can have huge effects on people. Even the small comments that I make have a lasting effect on an individual. I wonder how much impact our tone has on people.

What I have never thought about is how people view me if all I do is complain and offer critical assessment of situations. If all I am is negative about everything around me, we all know what we would label me as- Debbie Downer, or something of the like. And for good reason! Why would anyone want to spend time with someone that simply turns everything into the worst possible situation the world has ever seen?! I know I would not. If we are truly to be children of the Light, we should probably begin to think about what we are doing that is clouding that light. What are we doing that does not allow people to see the light that we bear? Are people seeing the HOPE that we have in this dark, fallen world?

Because of this, my friend Michael Yoder has begun practicing a model of personal accountability that was founded by Will Bowen, a pastor in Missouri. I have not checked with him in a while, however, I have thought about doing this myself. What kind of witness am I and what kind of hope do I have if all I do is complain about this world? Is that not close minded to this world? I should want my thoughts to be focused on the coming kingdom; His Kingdom.

I want to be a person who people are not slapped in the head when I am around. I want people to want to know more about me. I want to be a person that people can see the Light of Jesus through me. I desire for people to know that I will be someone that can give an encouraging word to them even when truth may be difficult to hear. I want to be a man of God that is so passionate about finding Him each day that I would see all things in a light that is far from a spirit of complaining.

Responses to DB - A Blog Series - The Holy Spirit and Spiritual Disciplines

This topic is so difficult for me. I find myself faced with a very undisciplined life in regards to following traditional disciplines. Fasting, devotions, Bible memorization, etc. All of these are difficult for me to say that I do them on a regular basis. I like to use the excuse that it is because of my busy-ness in college and all the other extracurricular activities that I participate in, I am unable to sustain a consistent, disciplined life. And this is not healthy to me. I know this. I "put my faith in Him and trust in His Spirit to guide me." And yet, I do not allow for that spirit to give me sustenance each and every day.

I have recently begun to work out and spend that twenty minutes, attempting to be a decent steward of the temple that He has entrusted me with. And I have tried to continue to rise in the morning at a decent time (although this has been a major challenge as I near the end of my time with those that are closest to me). However, these are meager attempts to discipline myself into a lifestyle that will allow me to be most productive and still be poured into by His Spirit.

I feel that this is most difficult for me because it was never a part of my life earlier than my college years. I'm 23 years old and let's face it. That's not old by any means, however, I have established myself in some habits that i simply cannot break easily; Healthy and unhealthy. However, it is by the Spirit that I have realized the desperate need for spiritual disciplines to be present in my life if I am to effectively lead people on a "Spirit-guided" path.

So because of this, I have devoted myself to spending some time fasting, each week; spending some time reading Scripture, each day; spending time in prayer, and not just speaking to God, but listening for God, each day. I feel that by devoting myself to this, I have allowed Him to push me to a new level of devotion and dedication to His cause.

How can I seek His heart each day if I don't even know what His Heart looks like?
How can I seek His heart each day if I don't know where to look?
How can I seek His heart each day if I don't allow Him to guide me?
How can I know what His Love truly is unless I depend on Him for life?

Responses to DB - A Blog Series - Friendships: The Reason For Living

How important are friendships!? Personally, I don't know where I would be if it were not for the friends that I have had over the years; even in times that seemed to be far from the path that God has laid for me.
Purdue: My roommates gave me the opportunity to experience a life that I would have never experienced inside the walls of the dorm room, waiting for them to come back.
Officiating: I have some pretty sweet guys that I can hang with and talk about just about anything.
And then there are some of the friendships that have truly shaped who I am and have been relationships that I could depend on in the thickest of situations.
Bethel: So many people that have shaped me into the man I am. Professors, peers, roommates, and classmates. I can't even begin to name all the people that have contributed to this.
Ministry: The pastors that I have been able to be mentored by and the volunteers that I work with are the best people in the world to work with. I would trade them for nothing.

The point of listing the different places that I have friendships and how they have affected me is to point out that we are made for relationships. Even the most intense introvert desires some form of relationship. We are so based on relationship that we have made more and more social networking sites on the Internet. We can't live without the relationships that dominated our lives.

As one who is in the business of connecting with students, I am finding that these students desire relationships, more and more. That seems very contrary to the common belief that students today are becoming less and less social because of texting, instant messaging, and impersonal communication. Our students crave relationships and that is why they are on all of the social networking sites (MySpace, Facebook, Twitter, etc.) and are constantly texting. They want to know more and more that they are connected to someone. I find it interesting how it is to operate in that world. Instant connection to all the people that you have ever known is very important to these students.

And the idea is permeating into the older generations. While this trend is far from the dominance that it has shown in the youngest of generations, it is catching onto the adults of this world; the people who want to connect face-to-face are doing what they can to fulfill that desire for relationships. Parents are acquiring Facebook accounts (and they should!) more and more each day. Whether the original intent is to check on their kid, or to connect with as many people in their high school graduating class, the desire to be fulfilled is still the need for relationship in their lives.

Relationships are paramount to our culture and we cannot avoid them. No matter how "old fashioned" we want to be.

Responses to DB - A Blog Series - Sex and the Rest of Your Life

This is such a hot topic and not just because DB talked about it in a class. This is a hot topic because, one could easily argue, our society is so far rooted in the idea that sex is good and sex is for everyone and sex SEX SEX SEX!It's everywhere we turn. Even Christian magazines use it as a way to attract students to pick up their magazine. Obviously, it is not as central as some secular magazines, however the subtleties are apparent to someone like me who pays attention to cultural norms.

This is also a hot topic, BECAUSE I'M A MAN. I have personally heard more sermons on lust and the effects it has on the mind and body be directed toward the men in the room, implying that the problem is huge in men. I know that the discussion happens in the female realm also, however this is exponentially higher for me. Sex is such a holy act. To say that this is simply a avenue of pleasure for two individuals is atrocious. I read a Bible that tells me the union of one man and one woman is the union into a one flesh being. The physical act of sex is a gift that is only to be enjoyed inside the bounds of marriage. This idea is very easy for me to grasp.

What is not easy to control or understand is how to stay away from the problem of looking at a woman lustfully and committing adultery in my heart. I have had many issues with this problem and it has remained just as persistent in my mind for the majority of my life. However, my understanding of how God created me and the true meaning of lust has given me some clarity and, perhaps some grace on how I look into the topic has allowed me some freedom from this bondage that is created through lust.

What is the actually act of lust. To me it seems that because I am a man, my body is geared to seek and find what pleases it and the eyes are included in that definition of body. For me, lust is the act of seeing what your eyes are focused on and not averting yourself. The temptation is present to begin to process that female in my mind, however it is the act that is lust. Because of this I was able to realize that perhaps I can live with this; this desire to look at women. Or at least see that God can help me control my thoughts. My mind has been tainted by sin and my body is directed by that sinful mind. However, when I realize that my thoughts can be changed by my heart and are changed by my heart, I can realize that if I remain true to my heart, I can be free from lustful thoughts. I may never be able to stop myself from noticing a hot looking babe walking down the beach in a two-piece bikini, but I can see that and have a different thought pattern that takes me away from sin and toward holiness in this regard.

Responses to DB - A Blog Series - On Reaching Out: Our Guilty Silence

This class opened up with a comment about the article that was written in The Beacon, our campus newspaper. This article was a Feature on me. One of the comments that I made had to do with the idea that I have noticed a trend of encouraging students to break out of the Bethel Bubble and yet we seem to restrict the ability of some students to do this. What the point of my comment was intended to emulate was the way that we preach to students to reach out to their world, to give to their community, and to provide for the suffering in the world, but we are poor at providing opportunities for this engagement. We don't assist students enough in getting into the world around them and engaging their culture and the context to which this campus is placed.

I continued the quotation with the idea of abandoning the importance of homework to increase the depth of the relationships that we have on this campus because this is the last time that we will see them; whether for four years or two more weeks. I am not backing down from this comment because it resembles the importance of networking the Body of Christ to accomplish His mission in this community. I wonder what would happen if the people on this campus participated in some form of community building activities that they were taking part in that engaged the community. If we were able to have student bonds be such that they are unbreakable and it is noticeable to the community that this is a tight knit group of individuals that were going to take Mishawaka/South Bend by storm, what kind of impact would that have?

What I find so interesting and troubling is that we have hundreds that come to the altar and profess that they will serve the Lord, but are not willing to serve the community around them. I am as guilty as the next one. I say that I will serve the Lord, but only the students that wish to be true disciples of Christ, whatever that means. My point still remains that we need to be committed to the true callings of Christ. We need to get out and serve! Not when we Graduate, but when feel the promptings of the LORD! (I am probably implying that this means now) I AM!

By going to the altar and saying what I "will do if God presents it to me" and walking by the homeless who is begging for a dime for his son is hypocritical and explains much about the character of who we are. I want to be someone that abandons unimportant things to go where God wants to take me. Wherever that means! What a difficult commitment!

Where are you willing to go?
Are you willing to go? Anywhere?

Responses to DB - A Blog Series - Dealing with Doubt

Doubt is an extremely healthy and yet an extremely negatively viewed concept. I, personally, find it difficult to think about Thomas in such a regard that he was a terrible disciple because he simply was willing to ask questions. The concept of asking questions is at the base of finding truth. If I am not willing to ask questions about the topic, then how can I possibly expect to find truth. Philosophers are professional inquisitors. They are commissioned with one task: Ask as many questions about as many topics as possible in order to discover what is ultimately the clearest truth that they can find.

As one that is responsible for the spiritual lives of many students, I must understand that the act of doubting this whole "Christian" thing, is completely natural and I would say is encouraged for someone that needs people to give them guidance on where to turn. What I think is unhealthy is when the inquisitor is unwilling to accept the fact that we are mortal beings and we have an end to our comprehension of the ways of the Lord.

As far as this doubt concept is in my own life, I find myself doubting people more than concepts. I find myself doubting Joel Osteen because he seems to present the Gospel in a way that gives into cultural norms: prosperity, wealth, greed. I find it difficult to not doubt Fmr. President Clinton on the allegations that he faced in reference to the Monica Lewinski scandal. I find myself doubting many people that give me a reason to doubt.

What I find myself not doubting is the things that I can find in the Word of God and the things that His Spirit whispers to me that affirm what the Word of God says. I find myself not doubting certain people that affirm the turths found in the Word of God. People like Pastor Dave Engbrecht at NMC. Dr. Bob at BC and GCC. Pastor Mark Beeson at GCC. Pastor Jason Miller at GCC. Pastor Derry Prenkert at NMC. My close friend Kory Lantz. My good friend Michael Yoder. I don't have to doubt everything that they say because I can trust that they are passionately seeking God's face in every situation of their lives. I can trust that they are dedicated to following the same Lord that I affirm.

However, that's not to say that I don't have doubts about what they are saying sometimes. But their lives are more of a testament to the truthfulness of their words. It is by their actions that I trust them and am able to doubt, less. It's not to say that sometimes I may doubt some of the things that they are saying. But rather than doubt their character, I am doubting my understanding of what they are saying.

This seems to play into my lack of doubt. I don't doubt what the Bible says is true, because the One who was the Word lived a life that no one could doubt. He lived a life that fulfilled the Law of Moses and fulfilled the prophesies that even HE proclaimed. He rose from the grave. The cross is an example of His faithfulness; the dispersion of the believer's doubt. Sure I doubt some things that I understand. I don't doubt those things that I read. I have no choice but to believe!

Responses to D.B. - A Blog Series - Ordering Your Private Life

Interesting discussion about this topic. How important is our personal and private life? God tells us that all things will be made known and that all things are revealed to Him. So how do we keep ourselves pure and connected and disciplined? I think also into this conversation is the need for being a genuine person in this day and age. It seems to be beyond a Christ-follower concept and has need in the culture that we live in. What does this mean?

In a culture that is so geared toward the individual and keeping people in their own worlds, we are very much keen to the situations that people find themselves in when they have a personal problem. Take Michael Phelps for example. Here's a man that has achieved so much and has done so well to become a very influential athlete and sports star. However, this guy gets a picture taken and his private life and convictions are questioned by all of the national media. We see "big-name" pastors and Christian leaders falling into pits of despair and ridicule because of some sediment of sin that is in their private lives. This aspect of our lives may remain the most important part of our lives.

I find it very interesting that God tells us to keep things like prayer, fasting, and praise of the Father in a secret and not allow it to be broadcast to the world as if to glorify ourselves. However, I find it very ironic that there are people that broadcast to the world their "super-christian" discipline or their revelations in ways that seem to only glorify themselves, and then by examining their personal lives, we find something quite on the contrary of those "words."

Makes me wonder about this blog. Am I using it to glorify God or am I using it to glorify myself by spouting off different views and opinions that seem to have the "Christian-ese" that other people have used. But am I truly treating this as a platform to share God's truth?

I feel that this is my way to communicate to anyone that wants to listen the need for change and the need to look more to God for guidance and direction than anything else. Sure, sometimes I may feel like this is a place to spout views. However, I think that I strive to make it more about glorifying His name by equipping His people for His cause.

So what does this mean for my private life? The biggest thing is that if I am going to preach it and God is going to reveal it, then I must be willing to live it as He reveals truth to me. It is difficult to fathom living a life that is not lived in accordance to the things that God is revealing to me. By arranging my private life in a way that is glorifying and pleasing to God, I allow Him to change me and to bring me to a place of holiness. Or whatever holiness is capable on this earth.