May 7, 2010

Sexual Impurity vs. Sexual Health

Lately, I haven't prioritized blogging. That's clearly evident as I had trouble writing that first sentence. The thing about blogging, is it makes me think critically about my world and the things that I am experiencing. Ironically, I haven't been thinking too critically about, well, anything. That ends today folks!

I want to revisit a thought that was rattling around my head the other day. It's the idea of Sexual Health vs. Sexual Purity.

I am not Sexually Pure. It's not even something that has really even been on the radar for most of my adult life (I'm not really sure when that started... adult life, that is). And as much as I would like to blame this on culture and its ability to "sexualize" just about anything, I have no one to blame but myself, because I have a choice. Every time. I have a choice. Do I align myself with God's Will to overcome sin and my sinful nature, or do I choose to give into the chains and weights of that sinful nature? But the thing is, for many of us, this question doesn't come up early enough in the process of experiencing something that could lead us to impurity. We ask that question either, right before, or during the "act" that we would rather not partake in. And for many, the barricades, are no where near far enough from the cliff of sin as they should be.

In many senses, we have, over time, allowed the term "Sexually Pure" to define those of us who have remained free from the act of sexual intercourse and from anything else that would not allow us to be "pure." But that seems to be quite the problem when it comes to sexual purity. Pure, by its very nature is without fault; without blemish; containing nothing but the original, most purest form of whatever you are describing as pure. So, in essence, my question is not to inquire about how to be sexually pure, rather, can you be sexually pure. Biblically, it seems almost impossible to be "pure" in any sense (Rom. 3:23).

It seems ironic to me that Christians are the biggest proponent of being sexually pure, yet we (and I say we because I have lived most of my life inside this school of thought) define "Sexual Purity" in terms probably better defined by celibacy. We "save" ourselves for our husbands and wives, yet the only thing that we have been saving is our "first time" of having intercourse. We settle for this being sexual purity because we have made something that, even in our own terms, is unattainable by any human being, save for the God-Man, Jesus. We need to come to terms with the fact that we are most likely not going to be "Sexually Pure," ever.

I am beginning to define myself as striving to be Sexually Healthy. Of course, I'm not sure that I could even describe this idea without being convicted of my own short-comings to such an expectation that I am about to outline, but, if He can speak through a donkey, I should hope to be "usable."

I'm convinced that in no way will we ever attain "Sexual Purity." Sorry folks, just don't see it happening. In no way am I licensing anyone to throw out standards either. As a matter of fact, the point to which I am making has more to do with striving for Sexual Health in our thought life and allowing that to translate into your ability to glorify God through a more pure lifestyle. Jesus talked about this in Matthew 5 and specifically in verse 28.

Sexual Health is a way for me to put the guardrails in my mind close enough to the road that I have a very hard time falling off of the cliff. To be sexually healthy is to push away anything that could lead us to the thoughts, acts and urges that bring on the chains and shame that is accompanied with sexually damaging thoughts and actions.

So for now, our goal should not be to avoid sex. Our goal should not be to avoid any act that reflects the sinful nature that we all possess. Our goal should become striving for thoughts that glorify God. Our goal should be to see sex as the gift from God that it is and see it in its unadulterated state.

Together, let's avoid the movies, or the parts in movies, that don't allow us to do any of the above. Turn off the tunes that reference sex as some kind of service that is expected of either party in a relationship. Shield our eyes, ears and ultimately our hearts from the perversion of this beautiful gift that has been given to those who unite under covenant before God.

What is your definition of Sexual Purity? How do you attain it?
Do your boundaries hold when they are under the intense pressure of temptation?

I'm sure that this conversation will continue as I process through this. Join me in the journey!

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