October 20, 2009

Comfortable in His Skin

Something that I have been thinking about the past couple days is the product of a combination of things. But, last night on the way back from Bethel (which was a real fun night of just chilling. Can't wait till the Hayride on Saturday) I began to find myself wondering about what life would be like if I was different.
"If I wasn't so loud and obnoxious, what would my life be like? If I was a different size of person (Figuratively and physically) how would my life have been different?"
Those were just a few of the thoughts that I had running through my head. This doesn't happen often, but sometimes these thoughts do pop back into my head. But this morning I was driving back from Martin's and I couldn't help but realize what kind of a ridiculous statement those were. Because as harmless as it might be to ponder those things, what about the product of pondering those things? What about the things that I start conveluting in my head about the possible outcomes of changing my story or the details of my story? What I notice begins to happen is I start comparing my "possible world" to my real life world and trying to devise ways to make the "possible," real.

Here's the point- In the moments where I want to change things and make things different in my life, I need to remember that I am put exactly where I am and have come through exactly where I have in order to accomplish exactly what He wants me to accomplish.

That seems so elementary to me, but this situation just reminds me that sometimes, I need to remember that going to back to fundamentals requires me to recognize my need for His strength. I refreshes the thought that He is what sustains me and not the things of this world that society and culture tell me are required for a good, happy, "American Dream Life." Things like a hot girlfriend, high paying job, secure job for that matter, or a nice car.

I want to continue working toward total dependence on Him and the Holy Spirit. Dependence on His comfort and not the comfort of what my mind tells me is comfort and security.

Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight. - Proverbs 3:5-6

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